6th Grade Xmas!

I totally forgot to post stuff about our Baseball Xmas Party and our last game!

Silly me! 🙂

“An Arncliffe Scots Baseball Team”

The Arncliffe boys are fired up today,
Was the buzz going round the ground,
When an eerie silence fell over the crowd
As mad Mick stepped up to his mound.El Dave has coached them through a winning streak,
And the team’s doing well without a hitch,
Then a terrible groan came from the opposition batter,
When Mick unleashed his first pitch.

He gave it a lash with a wild old swing,
And he got one of those bottom edge cuts,
Well Dave made a stuff up trying to catch the ball,
And got hit flush in the nuts.

Scotty came on for the injured El Dave,
And the crowd gave him jeers and hoots,
He was the only player that they’d ever seen,
Who played baseball in army boots.

The next ball was lollied out toward the first base,
It was an easy catch that just wouldn’t trouble ya,
Well you wouldn’t believe it, but the catch was dropped,
By the usually reliable Doubleya.

The problem was that he was preoccupied,
And that’s why the catch was a failure,
‘Cos if the immigration boys recognised him out there,
Then they would run him out of Australia.

“Come on boys!” was the cry from Big Ed,
Who was always talking things up,
If we keep playing as hopeless as this,
We’ll never get to play in the cup.

At the top of the fifth, the team was behind
And El Dave made a move that was great,
He decided to bring on the secret weapon,
Which was an unknown talent called Kate.

So far this season she’s only hit the ball twice,
But to be fair she’s really been trying,
Well she gave the ball an almighty whack,
And sent the bloody thing flying.

With all bases covered, up stepped Dan the Man,
Who bats like his cricket hero Matt Hayden
Until he grew a weird goatee beard,
And was a dead ringer for Osama bin Laden.

The runs were now flowing when Ralf came to bat,
When suddenly they started to stall,
Instead of swinging the bat like a baseballer should,
He thought he was swinging at a golf ball.

They were back in the field now and Matty had a pitch,
But he wasn’t feeling the best,
On his previous pitch the batter hit it straight back,
And Matt took one square on the chest.

The next guy thought he would make second base,
And was feeling a bit of a smarty,
But Brendan was there, and was combing his hair,
Like he was getting ready for the end of year party.

Everybody now wanted in on the act,
And Adam took the catch of the season,
Cameron threw zingers, and Nathan played hard,
Despite a broken arm from the previous season.

The runs were now coming at a pretty fast rate,
And Monica was going off her head,
She was experiencing something for the first time in her life,
Her pencil had run out of lead.

The Arncliffe boys needed one run to win,
Everyone felt tense, as they would,
Then out of the dugout came the player we know
As Smiley or Hollywood.

He hit the ball right over the fence,
And needed oxygen after running the bases,
Then it was off to the car park to celebrate the win,
Hit the piss and end up off our faces.

We drank some beer and had a snag or two,
And later gathered round the urinal,
El Dave gave us the news we wanted to hear,
“We’ve done it, we’ve made the grand final!”

Did they win the comp? I hear you ask,
Well something’s aren’t what they always seem,
Whether they did or they didn’t, you’ve got to admit
We sure make a hell of a team.

-A work commissioned by Ralf and penned by Peter Edmonds

I would like to note, I have hit the ball more than twice heh!

And here’s a report from our last game before Christmas, as written by our coach, Dave:

      Sixth grade finished the year in style beating Cougars 15-9. It’s that time of year so we were scratchin’ for a full squad today. In a real team effort, and people not fielding in their usual positions, we kept the errors to a minimum and scored well in every batting dig. We batted for the team, a few of us realising that the old saying is true and “A walk scores a run” with bases loaded. Dave Maltby was one of the more consistent batters as was Ralf Simdermann. “Dubbya”, otherwise known to the world as Alex Warner, also batted well. The pitching was shared by Scotty, Mick and Cameron, and Cam had 3 K-2s.
      Some of the team were a bit “how’s your father” after last night’s soiree at “Big John’s Kitchen” in Bondi. It was a hoot with all attendees resplendant in Hawaiian shirts. The denizens of Bondi didn’t know what to make of it. The restaurant even took our team photo to put on their wall, as a record of The Arncliffe Hawaiians, formerly known as Scots 6th grade, having been there. When we make it to the semi-finals we’re going to take the field for warm-up in our Hawaiian shirts.
      Our team best wishes go out to Matty Marshall who has been in Liverpool Hospital and will remain there until after Christmas. We had a whip around to score bail money but his Dad, Scott, said it didn’t work like that. Matt is in the Cardiac Unit at Liverpool Hospital and would reall appreciate a visit from anyone from the Scots Baseball Club.
      The inmates and staff of sixth grade wish all and sundry all the best for the holiday season.

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